Signs he never loved you
You might be reading this because you are wondering if your boyfriend was ever in love with you. Or maybe he never loved you; he was just pretending to love you. And if there is a slight chance he will ever love you.
I know exactly what you are going through, I have been there. I used to be in a relationship where I was blinded by love. All the signs he never loved me were visible, but I still hung on to the relationship and wanted him badly. There were days when I wished he could come back so we could get married and start a family.
Hopefully, these signs will be able to help you move on from him. Know that there is someone out there who is waiting to love you and appreciate your presence in his life.
According to Dear2dates, someone can pretend to love you in order to prove a point to themselves or to others, or just to brag. And when you are in love, it can be difficult to see their true motives. If you are a victim, do not blame yourself, just forgive and move on.
Table of Contents
Signs he never loved you
1. He’s never introduced you to any of his friends or family members
If a guy does not introduce you to any of his friends, you should worry. Most guys are fine with introducing their girlfriends to their friends, but they only introduce the woman they see a future with to their family.
So, if you have never met his friends or siblings during the time when you were dating, it means that he was hiding you or you were just a fling.
Even when he attended a barbeque with friends where they could bring their partners, he never took you along. He made excuses when you asked to come along with him.
Maybe the reason he did not want to introduce you to his friends or family is that he knew that he was not serious about you, or he was already in a steady relationship with someone else.
2. He has never taken you out on a proper date
One of the signs he never loved you is if he has never taken you out on a proper date. All your meetings were either at his place or your place.
And if a guy wants you to come over to his place before taking you on a proper date, it means he only wants to score (sleep with you) and is not really interested in getting to know you better.
3. He never celebrated special occasions with you
If your boyfriend did not remember your birthday or did not bother celebrating with you, it is one of the signs he never loved you.
Or if after knowing it was your birthday, he still did not give you a gift, it’s a sign he was not into you.
If he refused to celebrate Valentine’s Day with you because he does not believe in Valentine’s, it is also a sign he never loved you.
And if he did not celebrate certain milestones like your graduation, passing of an exam, getting a job, your anniversary, then the writing was on the wall that you were not the one for him.
When a guy loves you, he will do the simple things that will make you happy.
I dated someone who refused to attend my graduation and the excuse was that he will be at work. And even after work, he did not try to make it up to me. I was angry but because I was blinded by love, I let it slide.
4. He did not spend quality time with you
When a guy likes you, he will want to spend most of his time with you. Yes, he will still meet up with friends and family members, but you will be his priority.
Some guys will even suggest that you move in with them because they cannot get enough of you.
When a guy is always unavailable for you, you only meet up with him at his terms and not on your terms, it is a sign he never loved you.
I dated a guy who would only meet up with me at most twice a month, yet we stayed less than 30 miles apart. Even when I was around his area, and I wanted to meet up with him, he would refuse, but I continued with the relationship.
5. He hardly initiated contact
How often did he initiate contact when you were in a relationship? Or were you always the first person to call him or text him most of the time?
If you always had to remind him to call you, to respond to your texts, to come and see you, it is a sign he never loved you. When a man loves you, he does not have to be reminded of the simple tasks.
If he only contacted you when he wanted sexual or financial benefits from you, then it is a good thing that you have parted ways, because he was just using you.
Read more: 17 Signs he’s not into you
6. He never made you his plus one
If he had year-end functions at work where he could bring a plus one, but he never brought you along, it is a sign he never loved you.
Or if he could attend a wedding or a friend’s event with a plus one but he didn’t take you along, it means he did not regard you as his girlfriend.
7. He never agreed to be your plus one
If you’d asked him to come as your plus one to your friend’s event, wedding, work function but he always had excuses as to why he can’t come with you, it is a sign he never loved you.
8. He did not want to meet up with you when you were on your periods
If he did not want to spend time with you when you were on your periods, clearly he did not love you. When a guy loves you, he will want to be with you whether you can sleep with him or not.
Also, if you refuse to give in to his sexual demands while you are at his place, he will tell you to leave. Or if he is at your place, he will just get up and go, or he will not talk to you the entire time.
9. He flirted with other women in your presence
If a man flirts with other women whilst in your presence, it is a sign that he does not respect you.
If he also took pictures with them or of them and post them on social media, while he never posted any images with you, it is a sign he never loved you
When a man loves you, he will not try to make you jealous or make you feel like you are not enough for him.
10. He did not answer your calls or returned your calls
If he would not answer your calls when he claimed to be with certain people like his friends or certain family members or whoever, then it is a sign that you were not that important to him.
If he loved you, he would answer or return your calls at a convenient time without following him up.
11. He did not make any compromises for you
One of the signs a man likes you is when he does favors for you. If your ex always refused when you asked for his help, it is one of the signs he never loved you.
You could not ask him to do anything for you because he always disappointed you. Even if you happened to be stranded, you had to ask friends or family for help because he would never bend over backward for you.
And there is nothing that you can say or do to change his mind. If he tells you that he already had other plans, he wouldn’t postpone them for you.
12. He did not honor appointments
When he promised to come and see you or take you out, he would constantly disappoint you. He did not honor his commitments with you and he did not apologize timely. Read these 20 things a man will do for a woman he loves.
13. He abused you verbally
He crushed your self-esteem and found fault in everything you did; nothing was ever good enough for him. He did not compliment you, no matter what you did or how great you looked.
He gaslight you and made you doubt yourself. Read all about gaslighting tactics here.
If these signs were prevalent in your relationship, it is signs you were in an unhealthy relationship and he never loved you.
14. He prioritized everyone else besides you
You felt like you come last in his hierarchy. He was quick to respond to his family, his friends, colleagues, but he did not do the same for you.
15. His ex is still in the picture
If he was still in close contact with his ex even after you had voiced your concerns, then it is a sign he was not over his ex and cannot be in love with you.
If you felt like he prioritized his ex over you, he was always available for his ex when she needed him, but he could not do the same for you; what other sign do you need to prove that he never loved you?
16. He did not talk of a future together
When a man sees you in his future he will say “we” when talking about the future plans. If he never said “we” when talking about the future, it means he was not sure if you were the right woman for him.
When you asked him when he planned to marry you, he got angry, avoided the topic, or told you that you were being pushy.
17. He did not ask for your advice
If he never asked for your opinion when he wanted to do something, it is a sign he never loved you. When a guy sees you in his future, he will want to hear your views, even if he does not follow them.
18. He was in a committed relationship with someone else
If started dating you while he was already married, it is a sign he never loved you because he had no intentions of leaving his wife for you, he only wanted to use you.
19. He was not concerned about the finer details of your life
In a normal relationship, your partner will be interested in knowing how your day was. But your ex did not really care about your wellbeing or what you got up to.
20. He was always unavailable when you needed him
At the times when you wanted to see him or expected him to be by your side, he was never available for you. Even when you were sick, he could not come and see you.
21. He never took any pictures of you
He never took and posted any pictures of you while you were together. And if you did take a picture of him, he would refuse or not allow you to tag him.
But after he broke up with you, he posts his new girlfriend on social media.
22. He gets married so fast after the breakup
If after the breakup he got engaged so fast, it is a clear sign he never loved you. Maybe he was even dating the same lady while he was with you or he was cheating with you.
23. He does not beg you to come back after he has messed up
If after he has hurt your feelings you left him, but he did not try to win you back, he just let you go, it is a clear sign he never loved you.
Read more: 13 Signs he knows he messed up but is scared to admit
24. He does not get jealous
If he does not get jealous when he sees you entertaining other men or you posted an image of a guy on your status, and you still did not get a reaction from him, it is a sign he never loved you.
25. He did not want to be seen in public with you
If he did not want to be seen in public spaces with you, you could not go to the mall with him, or the park, or even do any outdoor activities with him, it’s a sign he never loved you.
Read more: 10 common mistakes women make when in relationships
How do you test a guy to see if he really loves you?
- Sickness test: You can tell him that you are sick and if he comes and checks up on you the very same day then he really loves you.
- The period test: You can tell him that you are on your periods and if he still wants to see you when you are on your periods then he really loves you.
- Pregnancy test: Tell him that you are pregnant and see how he reacts. If he says that you must keep the baby he will marry you, it is a sign he really loves you.
- Long term plans question: Ask him what his medium to long term goals are. If he includes you, or talks of making money to start a family, buy a house, it is a sign he really loves you.
How do you know if someone will never love you?
If you have addressed your concerns and given them a fair chance yet nothing has changed, then it is a sign they will never love you. If he does not give you attention, but he treats you like you are an option, then you should not wait for him. There is still someone who will love you more than you love him.
You can never force a man to love you, it is either he loves you, or he doesn’t.
How to stop loving someone who does not love you?
If only the heart had a switch, it would be much easier to forget and stop loving someone who does not love you. But it is a painful and lengthy process. You also want to check out these 9 tips on how to move on from someone you love.
1. Tell your brain it’s over, that was not love
You need to accept your reality. Stop daydreaming about a future that will never materialize. If he has shown you signs that he does not love you, even in the future he will still be taking you for granted. So the quicker you convince your mind that your partner will never change, the better.
2. Surround yourself with people
You will feel lonely after the breakup so you will need people who will help you fill the void. So rekindle old friendships and make new ones.
3. Find a hobby
Find something that can keep you busy to keep, it will help you not to think about him too much.
4. Advance yourself
Rediscover yourself, find your purpose, develop yourself and pursue your dreams and goals.
5. Date again
After you have worked on yourself and have healed, date other people. And never make comparisons between your ex and new partner because everyone is different.
6. Follow your head and not your heart
When you are happy again, your ex might try to come back into the picture. And when he does, please do not follow your heart but your head. Don’t agree to take him back until you have gone through this thought process (6 things to consider before taking your ex back).
