Are you constantly fighting with your significant other or constantly giving each other silent treatment? Has your partner betrayed you and feel like you cannot forgive? Does it feel like one of you is losing interest in the relationship and may have hinted breaking up as an option?

Do you feel like there is no solution to whatever that you experiencing in the relationship? Has your partner stopped meeting your expectations? If your answer is yes then you need to act.

It is normal for relationships to go through distress, but it doesn’t mean that it should be the end of the relationship. There are days when I am so in love and feel blessed to be married. But there are also days where I feel maybe I can be better off without him. Relationships require so much work and it is important to assess if your relationship is worth being saved or if you should just let go.

When to fight for your relationship

1. When you have contributed to the tension in the relationship

If you are responsible for the unhealthy state of the relationship, then you need to play your part in ensuring that the issues are resolved. If your partner wants to leave you because you have broken the trust, fight for your partner to give you another chance to redeem yourself.

2. When you know the potential of your relationship

If you have a history of being great and happy together and know that there is still more you can achieve together, then you might want to fight for your relationship.  You have been through so much together, you can’t lose hope as yet.

3. If you would advise someone to fight if they were in your shoes

If you would advise a friend, stranger, or family member who is in your shoes to fight for their relationship, then it means you should fight for it.

When not to fight for your relationship

1. If the person that you are fighting for is a married man or woman

Don’t fight to stay in a relationship with someone’s wife or husband, let him or her go. Only pursue the relationship if they have officially divorced and not when they are lying to you that they are unhappy in the relationship.

2. You are in a toxic relationship

If  a man lays his hands on you when you are still dating, leave him right away, don’t give him a second a chance. Do not fight for such a relationship because he will not stop. If you are married with kids, do not use the kids as an excuse why you cannot get out of that toxic relationship. Choose to lose the battle of love with him but win your life back.

Read more on how to come out of an abusive relationship

3. Your partner has already moved on

If after all your attempt of fighting, your partner still wants nothing to do with you, then you should let go. If they eventually come back to you, then you will decide if you want to give the relationship another chance or not.

How not to fight for your relationship

1. Do not use muthi, witchcraft or voodoo

Love is a choice, it should not be forced. You should never use witchcraft to make someone love you or stay in the relationship.

2. Do not use blackmail

Do not blackmail someone into staying in a relationship with you. Don’t use kids to fight your battles or threaten to incriminate your partner should they decide to leave you.

In South Africa, a former minister’s ex wife, decided to incriminate her former husband now that they are no longer together. If you are a law abiding citizen, report your spouse as soon as he commits a crime, don’t wait until you have broken up.

3. Do not threaten to kill them or commit suicide

Being left in a relationship is a very painful experience but it does not mean that should they no longer want to be with you, you have to destroy them or destroy yourself. There is still life after a breakup or divorce.

Tips on how to move on from someone you love

Conclusion

The best fighting strategy is to pray and also do those things which makes your partner happy. 

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